Punditfic

Title: I've Got No Strings To Hold Me Down
Rating: G
Cast: Wyatt, Aasif, Jessica, John Oliver, Larry, Jon, various celebrity cameos
Disclaimer: #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. Characters belong to the Report. Names of real people are used in a fictitious context, and all dialogue, actions, and content are products of the author's imagination only.

Third Monday fic for count_nickula. (On the AO3.) After Wyatt delivers his final TDS segment, he goes off to travel the world. But he will always be with his Daily Show friends in some form. Specifically, felt.

( 'This week has been awesome. Crazy awesome. But I gotta move on. The road just keeps calling to me, you know?' )

Title: In Summer's Parching Heat
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: Olivia/Kristen (pre-femslash), Jon(/"Stephen"), John Oliver, Wyatt
Disclaimer: #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. Characters belong to the Report. Names of real people are used in a fictitious context, and all dialogue, actions, and content are products of the author's imagination only.

Teen-through-young-adult AU: Jon[athan] and "Stephen" are gay dog groomers in California, while Olivia and company are eighth graders nearby. Oh, and a cute new British kid just transferred into their class. And Kristen maybe likes him?? Drama!

Wildly out-of-season, I know, but I needed a last-minute fill for the hc_bingo round 2 card, prompt "heat stroke."

( 'I've just moved here from England, so you're welcome to ask me any questions you have in preparation for our inevitable re-conquest of your charming little nation. Cheerio.' )

Rating: G unless otherwise stated
Disclaimer: #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. The content is the product of my imagination, and the characters aren't mine.

Just finished an all-TCR set of fills for my card in hc_bingo. A couple were fics, which have already been crossposted, and the rest are fanart:

Title: Do I Dare--? (homesickness)
It's not a gay thing. Honest. Stephen just happened to be missing South Carolina at the time, and Jon walked by with a peach, so Stephen couldn't resist a taste. That's a normal thing for heterosexual guys to do. Right?

Title: Tentacolbert (attacked by a creature)
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Tentacle sex.
In which Stephen finds love (and, the next day, slime) in unexpected places, and Jon should really learn to be more sensitive to cultures different from his own.

Title: Not A Southern Belle (heat stroke)
I honestly couldn't tell you whether Stephen's really fainting, fake-fainting to induce Jon to fuss over him, or fake-fainting because he believes it's The Done Thing for a South Carolina peach in a lovely dress.

Title: Fear Puppetry (brainwashing)
Who's puppeting who?

Title: Are You Sure This Is Super Serum? (experiments by evil scientists)
Rating: PG
Sinister!bearded!Jon has brought Stephen to his secret lab, with promises of Captain-America-style super serum. Now Stephen's starting to have second thoughts, but it may already be too late....

Title: Archnemesis
Rating: PG
Contents: Innuendo
Characters/pairings: Jon/"Stephen"
Disclaimer: #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. Characters belong to the Report. Names of real people are used in a fictitious context, and all dialogue, actions, and content are products of the author's imagination only.

Drabble (100 words) inspired by kribban, wondering if Stephen still considers Jon his archnemesis even after they get together.

( Archnemesis )


Title: And It's F@#king Golden
Rating: G
Characters/pairings: Jon/"Stephen"
Disclaimer: Same as above.

Stephen reacts to Jon's recent exchange with an Emmy.

( And It's F@#king Golden )

Title: Vox Populi
Fandom: The Colbert Report
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: Jon, Stephen (the real one!)
Disclaimer: Work of parody; not real; not mine.

For the "make a happy ending" challenge, with a prompt from ntjnke: Stephen loses his voice. Forever.

( Stephen grins as he unpacks. )

Title: May The Horse Be With You
Rating: G
Characters/pairings: Jon/"Stephen", Olivia, animals
Disclaimer: The Report characters and their universe are property of Stephen Colbert, the other Report writers, and I presume Viacom. The real person(s) are used in a fictional parody context.

Written for the picture prompts thread, in which w_thit gave me this.

The background of the setting is an AU I've been kicking around in my head. Late eighties; slight fudging of ages, but not much. Jon[athan] and "Stephen" are running their upscale dog salon in California, and have started to bond with kid!Olivia, who lives nearby. (Olivia goes to school with kiddie versions of some of the other correspondents, but that doesn't come up in this bit.)

( The girl made a beeline for the door, quickly enough that she didn't see Jonathan wince (and Lady McPawsington try to claw him for mishandling her, though he had wisely clipped her nails first thing). )

Title: Prawn Today, Hair Tomorrow
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: Olivia/Kristen
Disclaimer: Characters belong to the Report. Names of real people are used in a fictitious context, and all dialogue, actions, and content are products of the author's imagination only.

Rounding the week off with a belated fill for the prompt "Irresistible," from colbertstark6.

( 'Don't lie. You've been checking out my hair all morning.' )

Title: Ratings-Grabbing For Two
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: "Stephen", Jon, various audiences
Disclaimer: Characters belong to the Report. Names of real people are used in a fictitious context, and all dialogue, actions, and content are products of the author's imagination only.

A week-long slice of mpreg. The first line is ripped from canon; the rest of the fic takes that and runs with it.

( 'Coming up next!' interrupted Stephen, hands planted on the desk. 'More very important personal news that Jon Stewart doesn't have time to pay attention to!' )

Title: Cougar Hunting
Rating: G (dart guns are G-rated, right?)
Cast: Kristen, Olivia, Sam
Disclaimer: Work of parody. Not real; not mine.

Inspired by this segment: Kristen takes Olivia on a hunt for the most dangerous game.

( 'Are you ready?' )

Medium: Television
Fandom: The Daily Show
Subject: Kristen Schaal/Olivia Munn
Title: You Were Born For Stardom's Crown

Olivia's fiery hotness often obscures the fact that she is a raging geek. Kristen is an adorable ginormous dork even when she's writing a sex book. Now watch me turn these facts into a shippy mix about Olivia's ascent to TDS, in defiance of the fact that they have yet to appear on screen together.

Graphic textures from this site. High-res cover art here.



( I'm desperate, I'm bored, I'm begging for change. What if you're normal and wanna be strange? )